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Tallulah Bankhead: I thought I...

Tallulah Bankhead: I thought I...

I thought I told you to wait in the car.

Source: On seeing a former lover after an...

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Lily Tomlin: If you read...

Lily Tomlin: If you read...

If you read a lot of books, you're considered well-read. But if you watch a lot of TV, you're not considered...

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Jane Sherwood Ace: The chickens have...

Jane Sherwood Ace: The chickens have...

The chickens have come home to roast.

Source: In Peter's Quotations, by Laurence J....

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Marie Lloyd: I'm one of...

Marie Lloyd: I'm one of...

I'm one of the ruins that Cromwell knocked about a bit.

Source: Song title
--...

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Billie Holiday: If you think...

Billie Holiday: If you think...

If you think dope is for kicks and for thrills, you're out of your mind. There are more kicks to be had in a good case...

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Ethel Merman: I can never...

Ethel Merman: I can never...

I can never remember being afraid of an audience. If the audience could do better, they'd be up here on stage and I'd...

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Candice Bergen: People see you...

Candice Bergen: People see you...

People see you as an object, not as a person, and they project a set of expectations onto you. People who don't have...

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Judy Garland: I've never looked...

Judy Garland: I've never looked...

I've never looked through a keyhole without finding someone was looking back.

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Elayne Boosler: To listen to...

Elayne Boosler: To listen to...

To listen to your own silence is the key to comedy.

Source: In The Speaker's...

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Phyllis Diller: You can say...

Phyllis Diller: You can say...

You can say the nastiest things about yourself without offending anyone.

Source: In...

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Lucille Ball: The secret of...

Lucille Ball: The secret of...

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.

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Amie Comeaux: Some things are...

Amie Comeaux: Some things are...

Some things are meant to happen
Some things are bound to be
Love has a way of making doubting hearts...

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Catherine Deneuve: Opportunities are often...

Catherine Deneuve: Opportunities are often...

Opportunities are often things you haven't noticed the first time around.

Source:...

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Mahalia Jackson: Anybody that sings...

Mahalia Jackson: Anybody that sings...

Anybody that sings the blues is in a deep pit, yelling for help.

Source: In Aretha...

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Nina Simone: It's time to...

Nina Simone: It's time to...

It's time to take a look at my failures and stop calling them successes. Now I can start working at something that can...

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Alice Childress: Life is just...

Alice Childress: Life is just...

Life is just a short walk from the cradle to the grave -- and it sure behooves us to be kind to one another along the...

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Alice Childress: . . ....

Alice Childress: . . ....

. . . it's a poor kind of man that won't fight for his own freedom.

Source: In And...

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Patti Smith: As far as...

Patti Smith: As far as...

As far as I'm concerned, being any gender is a drag.

Source: In Words of Women...

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Marianne Moore: I see no...

Marianne Moore: I see no...

I see no reason for calling my work poetry except that there is no other category in which to put...

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Lucille Clifton: People wish to...

Lucille Clifton: People wish to...

People wish to be poets more than they wish to write poetry, and that's a mistake. One should wish to celebrate more...

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